Latest update

I saw my family doctor yesterday and he broke down my diagnosis. I will not be seeing any more specialists. He is not going to be treating the fibroids or the swollen lining because they are no longer a priority. He says try to lose some weight and see if that helps with the fibroid issue but he is going to leave it at that.

The biopsy results are in and my doctor is treating that as a priority. Turns out there are four spots in my stomach that have irregular cells. These cells are in the process of turning into ulcers and if left untreated will turn into stomach cancer. Now, not all ulcers turn into stomach cancer but there is some marker in these cells that pretty much confirm they will turn into cancer if they turn into ulcers. So he is treating me pretty aggressively with a crazy cocktail of drugs to get these spots not to turn into ulcers and to correct whatever damage that has been done so far. The plan is to get my stomach to a place where these spots heal themselves. He figures that the constant pain is due to the forming ulcers not really the fibroids or lining and that is why he wants to treat that more aggressively than the other things.

I start two weeks’ worth of drugs tomorrow and hopefully, it makes the pain go away. The pain is the marker for his success; if the pain remains in two weeks then he will need to get more aggressive in his treatment. If the pain goes away, then the treatment worked and I have to have scopes of my stomach done every five years to make sure the cancer stays away.

I also have gastritis which is caused by stress. He says as soon as I stop stressing out, that will work it out. I say puhsah to that one but maybe I’ll take up yoga or something. But unless the insurance company develops a heart, I think my stress levels will be as elevated as ever.

Given that I love food more than I love some people, I am not going to screw around with this. I will happily take this drug cocktail and hope for the best because the thought of giving up all the different kind of food out there would break my heart. It was not the diagnosis I was expected and hearing all this threw me for a loop at first but like everything else, I am going to roll with it.

I find it so ironic that someone who loves food so much ends up with serious stomach issues.

Scary Scooby Doo

I am going to file this one under; parenting failure #340.

If you read this blog, you know, when it comes to this parenting thing, it feels like I am continually messing up my children in some way. At the time I think I am making good decisions and it is only after my children have been scarred that I realize those decisions aren’t the right ones.

The latest bad parenting moment involves Scooby Doo. You know the loveable cartoon Great Dane with the speech impediment and his group of mystery solvers; Shaggy, Daphne, Velma and Fred. They drive around in a tricked out van solving mysteries involving monsters like the Loch Ness monster, Egyptian Mummies, and the Abominable Snowman. It is 1970’s cartoons at their finest.

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I found a couple seasons worth of Scooby Doo cartoons and close to 15 movies on my free cartoon channel and this made me really happy. Scooby Doo cartoons are really entertaining. Most days I am subjected to the screeching sounds of Johnny Test or the disgusting antics of the Rocket Monkeys. Have you ever seen these cartoons? They are horrible. They are loud and gross and really gross and really loud and after about ten minutes of them, I need to leave the room. I absolutely detest these cartoons and the boys are not allowed to watch them or any other cartoons as often as they would like. So finding Scooby Doo was win win. The boys could get their fill of cartoons and I could actually sit and watch with them without having my brain explode.

Fantastic, right?

Not so much.

Turns out those cartoon monsters were a bit too much for the boys. We decided to watch a couple of the movies over a couple consecutive movie nights to see just how much we liked them. Our movie nights have started happening during the week now since the boys are off for the summer. We turn on a movie around 8pm, get a big bowl of snacks and watch the entire movie before heading up to bed. The first night went really well. Neither boy thought the movie was scary and they were looking forward to watching another movie the following night. The following night is when things started to go downhill. Mats was frightened by the monsters in this movie and asked to sit with me during the scary bits. By the end of it, he was not scared anymore and going to bed was a breeze. The third night Mats sat with me for the entire movie. Even though this one was not as scary as the second one, the dark seemed to be intimidating Mats a lot. He was not very keen about sitting by himself and wanted to stay as close to me as he could. After the movie, Mats was really apprehensive about going to bed. He went into his room and turned off the lights but throughout the night he kept coming into my room until I let him sleep in my bed. The next night Matss confessed the movies had be scaring him and although he was trying to be as brave as he could be was not comfortable sleeping in the dark by himself anymore. I plugged in a nightlight for him, hoping the added light would help him get some sleep. And even though he did try to sleep in his bed, he just could not stay asleep and woke up screaming for me at 1am. The 1am screaming went on for a couple of nights before I just let Mats start sleeping in my bed, it was easier than trying to find him in the dark at 1am.

I have been trying to coax him back onto his own bed over the last couple of night but he is just not having any of it. I have tried laying down with him and then leaving as soon as he falls asleep hoping he will just stay asleep for the rest of the night. That has not worked yet. Throughout the night Mats will wake up and if I am not there then he will start calling for me and if I am not in the same room as he is, he will start screaming with fear. He is just that afraid of being by himself right now. He would much rather sleep in my bed than sleep by himself in the dark.

Maks wasn’t immune to the Scooby Doo scares either. He had a couple of nights where he asked me to lay down on his bed with him until he fell asleep because he was frightened of one of the monsters he had seen in the movies. He got over his fear of being alone fairly quickly though. I think he would much rather have the entire bed all to himself even if that means sleeping in the dark by himself.

Scooby Doo is now on the limited watch list; the boys still like watching the Scooby Doo cartoons but only during the day with all the lights on.

Sleeping Over

Last Friday, Maks had his first ever sleepover. Like an honest to goodness sleepover at a friend’s house for the entire night.

Just to remind y’all, Maks is eight! Growing up, this whole sleeping at a friend’s house was not a normal thing. I wasn’t allowed to sleep over at a non-family member’s house until I was in my twenties and even then the sleepover wasn’t with permission. It was because I had forgotten my house keys and I was locked out of the house after a night out and after knocking on the door for fifteen minutes at 2am, with no answer, I ended up going to stay at the friend’s house because I didn’t want to sleep on the porch. Because, you know; safety first. So I am not too accustomed to really young kids spending the night out.

Now back to Maks and how this all went down.

I was far from keen on the idea of Maks sleeping over at anyone’s house at eight years old but the friend that asked him to stay over has been buddies with him since they were eleven months old. He is actually Maks’ oldest friend. And he was going through Maks withdrawal.

P and Maks used to be in daycare together and used to see each other every day since they were babies. But since both boys moved on from daycare to big kid school two years ago, they don’t see each other as often. They usually start to miss each other after a couple of weeks of being apart and the whining starts. Then the calls for play dates between the moms starts. And then playdates gets arranged and the boys get together and go crazy. Maks and P try to have pretty regular playdates; they hang out with each other at least twice a month. But with summer camp and busy schedules, P’s mom and I have not been able to arrange a proper playdate and P was having some issues with this. P’s mom called and told me the story. Apparently, P starting crying in the car one morning on the way to camp because he said he missed Maks and wanted him to move into the house that was for sale down the street so they could play together more. P has never been upset about missing playdates before so P’s mom called and asked if Maks could sleep over last Friday. Her thinking was this way the boys could play for as long as they wanted and P could be reassured his friend was still his friend.

After hearing this how could I say no?

So I agreed to a kid swap. Last Friday Maks would sleep over at P’s house and this Friday P would sleep over at our house. This way Maks could have his first sleep over at P’s house and P could have his first sleepover at our house.

So along came Friday and I swear the excitement was overflowing. The first thing Maks said when he woke up was “today’s the sleepover!” And things just went from there. He packed his knapsack and got his sleeping bag in record time. He even took a bath without being asked a million times. He was supposed to be dropped off at P’s house at 5:30pm and since P only lives 10 minutes away, I wasn’t planning on leaving the house until 5:20pm but by 4:45pm he had been sitting on the steps with his knapsack, pillow and sleeping bag for 15 minutes, patiently waiting, so we left home a bit early. As soon as we got there, he and P disappeared and that was the last I saw of them for the night.

According to P’s mom, they had a hearty dinner of pizza and chips, played video games and watched movies for most of the night. By 10pm, they were exhausted and they ended up going to sleep, which for them is late. They ended up making up at 7am the next morning for breakfast and neither was cranky.

All in all, Maks’ first sleepover was a success.

Now for P’s sleepover at our house this Friday.

Snoring Conspiracy Theory

I have been observing Millhouse when he sleeps a lot lately and I have come up with this conclusion; Millhouse is a faker.

I think he only snores when I am close vicinity so he can have the bed all to himself.

Now this is not some sort of off the cuff observation, I have actual proof to substantiate my claim. I have been watching and more importantly listening to Millhouse sleep and I have noticed when he sleeps with either of the boys, he barely snores. He snores a little bit but it is really quiet. The snoring is limited to little hiccups every now and then. There is no crazy loud, wall rumbling kind of snoring.

But when he sleeps with me, he sounds like a mutant bear running laps with a chainsaw. And the snoring usually doesn’t stop until I have gotten off the bed and gone to sleep with one of the boys. I have noticed that pretty soon after I have gotten off the bed, he takes over the entire bed; sprawling across the entire thing and creating a person like blanket roll so he can fling his arm and leg over and the snoring definitely gets turned down.

If I were to squeeze my way back onto the bed, the crazy snoring starts back again.

So you see dear readers, Millhouse’s crazy snoring is a ploy so he can get the entire bed to himself.

Spoken up sooner

For a long time things have not been the greatest for me physically. I have had a lot of medical things go wrong and it all seems to be compounding to right now.

In February/March, my doctor confirmed that my thyroid had stopped working and I have to be on hormone replacement therapy for the rest of my life. Getting used to this has been rough. I have good days and bad days. The bad days and filled with headaches, dizziness, feeling lost and exhausted. The good days have me feeling almost like me again.

But around spring, it felt like there were so many more bad days than good days and I ended up going back in to see my doctor about my medicine. He assured me everything was where it needed to be but he also ran some blood tests to make sure nothing else was wrong.

My blood count was wrong. My anemia was back.

Having anemia is nothing new for me. I have had it since I was 17 and I have dealt with it pretty well since I was 17 but the general feeling of crappiness just didn’t seem to be going away this time and that made my doctor take things a bit further than he normally took them. He had me doing a couple more blood tests and ultrasounds to make sure there wasn’t anything else going on.

Turns out there were more things going on. I have cysts in my right ovary, fibroids and a swollen, larger than normal endometrial lining. Some basically there are a bunch of things in my uterus that should not be there and they are all fighting for space and things are getting mighty cramped. This explains the near constant cramps I have been having for years. It explains the heavy periods for seven to ten days. It explains the sharp pains that I have every couple of days. For YEARS I have thought all of this pain was normal. For YEARS I have just self-medicated trying to deal with it. And now to be told this is not normal and something is wrong, gives me some sort of vindication. I feel like I don’t have to just suck it up and be quiet anymore; I can get help and make it all go away.

Talking to my doctor, he really thinks the best option for me would be a hysterectomy. He has me going to see a specialist later this month to figure out if this is something I should do or if there are other ways of dealing with this. I am not sure how I feel about having a hysterectomy done. I know that right now I don’t want any more kids but I don’t know if that will change in the future. So this is a pretty big decision I need to think about and I don’t want to move forward until I have all the facts.

Now if this was all I had going on, it would be easy to deal with but it is not. On top of the ultrasounds, I have also had a colonoscopy and gastroscopy done. The colonoscopy found nothing, which is awesome given my family history of colon cancer. The gastroscopy found some issues though. On top of everything else, I also have gastritis and the scope clinic did a biopsy to figure out what is causing the gastritis. Gastritis is when your stomach gets angry at you and starts swelling and hurting and rebelling in general. Depending on what is causing it, I may end up getting weekly shots from the doctor or just over the counter medication but we won’t know what is causing it until the biopsy results come back.

So anemia + fibroids + swollen endometrial lining + gastritis = why my middle area has been hurting like it has for so long. The anemia explains the headaches, the dizziness, and fibroids, and gastritis explains the constant pain. I finally know why things have been hurting like they have and I don’t just have to live with it anymore. It sucks that I have been living with this for this long thinking it was all normal. I wish I had gone into the doctor before I started feeling this bad to figure out what was going on but at least now I know. And I am hoping that knowing all this makes my treatment work.

Bruised & Broken

So Millhouse had a pretty bad Saturday.

Now it should be noted that none of the events that transpired were done with malicious intent and it was not my goal to have anyone hurt. That being said, here is what happened.

Mat and Maks got these super cool squirt gun things this weekend. They are not squirt guns; rather, they are these really long tubes. You suck in a bunch of water into them and then you push really hard on the handles and the water sprays really far away. It is pretty cool and a lot of fun to play with. How I know this is what led up to the bruised part.

Mat and I were in the backyard having a squirting contest. We would fill up our tubes and squirt them as far as we could. Then I came up with the brilliant idea of calling Millhouse outside to be the judge for our little competition. Now, we didn’t really need a judge and I totally had ulterior motives for calling him out there. Millhouse doesn’t like to get wet and even if he stood really far away from Mat and I we would still be able to squirt him, he just didn’t know that. Mat and I conspired to call Millhouse outside and even though we knew he would stand really far away, we would still squirt him and get him soaked. Great plan, right?

Well, it didn’t work out like we planned.

Millhouse did come outside and stand really far away and on the count of three Mat and I did squirt our tubes as hard as we could at him, only he didn’t just stand there getting wet. He screamed and tried to run back inside. Now, Millhouse is not the most coordinated person out there and in his attempt to get back inside, he tripped over the screen door and feel right onto his head into the kitchen.

Millhouse is a big guy so when he falls it sounds like the titans descending from Mount Olympus. It is a loud rumbling, thunderous kaboom. It was so loud the NP came running up from downstairs because she thought something had been thrown down the stairs.

All in all, he was fine. He had bruised the back of his leg and scratched up part of his arm, he was not pleased with me and my conspiring but once all was looked over he was fine.

That should have been the end of his bad luck but it wasn’t.

Fast forward to bath time for the boys. Millhouse is responsible for organizing the boys and making sure bath time goes off without a hitch. This bath time things were a little more frazzled than normal. There was a lot more nakedness running around and it was harder to corral all the zaniness. So while Millhouse was running around trying to get children cleaned up, he whacked his toe on the side on the bed.

Whacking his toe is fairly normal for Millhouse but this time, he whacked it hard enough for him to hear a loud crack. He knew something wasn’t right with it so after bath, he came down and iced his toe. He seemed to be OK after it was iced and wasn’t changing colour or anything so he just assumed he whacked it really good and all was good.

Turns out it wasn’t.

Around 2am, his toe starting to hurt a lot. And when he looked it over, the toe was starting to change colour. So off to the hospital he went. After two hours in the ER and one xray, it turns out he broke his toe. It wasn’t a big enough break to require a cast but the toe needs to be buddy taped (taped up to the toe next to it) for the next two weeks. He is supposed to stay off his toe for the next two weeks but given he spends all night walking, that will be hard.

He is now heavily medicated for the pain and limping around.

Here’s hoping next weekend is better for him.

Principal’s Award

HE DID IT!!!!!

I just got an email from Maks’ teacher and he will be receiving the Principal’s award for the most improved student on Thursday. He has wanted this award since he actually starting trying last year. He was disappointed last year because even though he worked really hard, he did not win. He worked really hard this year and has really improved in all areas. But after last year, he had pretty much convinced himself that he would not be winning this award this year. And as far as I know, he doesn’t know that he is going to be winning the award this year.

I am over the moon proud of him. I was over the moon proud when I saw how well he was doing in general but I really thought that he would not be getting the award this year. I just figured even with all the improvements, and because he won the gym award last month, some other child would get the principal’s award. I was super happy to see the email from his teacher and I know as soon as he finds out about it, he will be super excited also.

I really am at a loss for words at this one, because I am just that proud.

Continuously failing at dating

Millhouse entered middle age last week. He wasn’t that excited about it and really just wanted the day to pass without any sort of hoopla; but I was not to be deterred and insisting on marking this milestone with something epic.

So we went on a date.

I think it has been something like nine months since our last date so this was something we don’t do very often. Millhouse picked the restaurant. I took this as a good thing, I figured him being involved in the date process was a good sign and showed he wasn’t against the idea completely. Most times when I suggest a date, I get shot down immediately. Him not saying no immediately is good.

Now since we had decided to do this on Thursday night for Friday night and had picked a super popular restaurant, our choice of reservations was pretty limited. We ended up getting a reservation at 6:45pm. Now just to put the reservation time in perspective, the restaurant is about an hour away on a good day with no traffic and I get home from work at 5:15pm.  That meant we would need to make it there in the height of rush hour in about an hour. So in order to make the reservation, I would have to book it home, speed shower, speed change and be out of the house in 15 minutes max.

Max.

It was a lot of pressure but it could be done. Millhouse agreed to bathe the boys & organize dinner for them so I could come home and get ready as soon as I got home and we were hoping we would make it to the restaurant in time.

Now when you have a plan with a super tight timeline, things always go wrong. Even though I left work early, I ended up getting home only five minutes earlier than I normally get home. I super speeded it through the shower but was stonewalled when it came to finding something to wear. I was planning on wearing jeans and a nice top but it was really hot on Friday and I didn’t want to wear jeans because if I ate a lot in tight jeans on a hot day, I would have been miserable. So I had to find a nice dress really quick.

After much rummaging, I just couldn’t find anything. And at the same time, I was telling Millhouse to change because he was wearing cargo shorts and a tee shirt with a picture of a kitten on it. I told him he couldn’t go to dinner wearing shorts and a tee shirt with a picture of a kitten on it. He didn’t want to change because he was comfortable in what he was in and he was getting agitated at me for even suggesting that he change his clothes.

After much arguing, he ended up putting on a collared shirt and jeans and was positively miserable by this point. He ended up just stomping down the stairs after he had changed and yelling at me to hurry up from the bottom of the stairs. His yelling coupled with the time, ticked me off and I ended up throwing on whatever and then just going downstairs, dressing as I went. I stomped out to the car and finished putting on my clothes while Millhouse was getting gas. Literally, I was putting on a shirt as he was pumping gas.

On the ride to the restaurant, things were tense and we barely spoke to one another. Millhouse was mad for having to change. And I was mad because I basically ended up changing in the car, wearing shoes I didn’t like. It was not a good way to start things off.

Even though we left the house 15 minutes later than we planned to, we ended up making it to the restaurant on time.

When he got there and saw just how tiny it was, I knew this whole date thing was a mistake. It was a totally loud, totally small restaurant with really tight seating. The restaurant was so small we ended up sharing a table with another group of people. For real, there was a group of three girls at the end of the table and we were on the other end of a table that sat eight. So doing the math, there were only two chairs in-between us. Millhouse does not like doing things like that and gets very uncomfortable being that jammed in with other people. Plus we were at the very back at of the restaurant where it was really hot. Heat and jammed up seating make Millhouse miserable. So I asked for a different table and was told there were none available. So we sat where they put us and Millhouse just got more and more stressed as the meal went on. We got through the appetizers pretty well but halfway through the main, he was ready to go. There was really nothing I could do for him to change his mind. He said he was tired of shouting over all the noise, dealing with the heat and having a loud group sitting at the same table as him, he just wanted to go and go right then and there. So whatever they had already cooked, they packed up for us and we left without getting dessert because they had not started cooking that yet for us.

After unceremoniously leaving the restaurant in a pretty big rush with a Millhouse who was leaving with or without his food, we headed up to meet some of our daycare mom friends at a local pub. Normally we are not pub type people but we were invited because one of the moms was celebrating her birthday. When we got there, the birthday girl was still having dinner with the people who had showed up early and there was no more room at her table so we ended up moving to the bar and waiting for them to finish up. We sat at the bar for about an hour and a half. The birthday girl, who was mighty tipsy at this point, came over to see Millhouse for a bit. She needed a dancing partner at this point and decided to use Millhouse as her pole because he is not a dancer and just stood there as she gyrated around him. Now Millhouse is used to inappropriate behavior and on the regular this sort of thing doesn’t bother him too much but after being miserable for most of the evening, this just did not sit well with him. This whole untimely dancing thing made Millhouse feel not so comfortable and we decided to leave shortly after that.

All and all this date was an epic fail.

EPIC.

Millhouse will probably take 18 months before he is ready to go out with me again. And I can’t say I blame him. I may just send him out with his friends because every time we try to do something like this, it just goes wrong.

May Madness

And just like that; May 2015 is over.

The last two weeks in April and the entire month of May are always the most hectic part of the year for me, hence, my longer than usual hiatus from blogging.

Apparently there were a lot of people getting it on in August and September in the years past, because I have a whole lotta birthdays in those seven weeks and the majority of those birthdays are for immediate family. In fact, I think I only have one non – family birthday in May. And the non – family birthday ends up being a big one because it is for the daycare mom who likes to go out drinking and celebrate in a big way. She is one of those people who enjoys company on her birthday and will party hard until the end. I know she is planning on going to Vegas next year, and since I will not be making the trip, I get one weekend in May off next year. This year all of my weekends have had some sort of birthday celebration in them, which is a good thing, I like celebrating birthday but when you have had birthday cake for 4 weekends’ straight, things start to get a bit much.

Now the birthday saturated part of my year is over and I can go back to doing what I normally do, which, I guess means that I will be doing non-birthday things and then preparing for all the upcoming birthdays coming up on the horizon.

I need to figure out the rest of the year.