What happened in between

I haven’t blogged in a really long time. Almost six weeks, which isn’t the longest that I have gone without blogging but it very close. I have been around but blogging has been really low on my list of things to do.

So here is what has happened since I last blogged (in no particular order. This is just as I remember things):

  • Mats won the principals award. He has been doing really well this year. He is now the “big” kid in his class. He has taken on more of a leadership role and his teacher really likes that. She wants him to start practicing for next year now. He knows the curriculum really well and having him review is not helping him anymore. So he needs to start working on the curriculum for next year so he doesn’t get bored. Based on all this, his teacher decided to give him the principal’s award at the last celebration assembly. He was pretty proud of himself, as he should be. He was telling us for about a week before the assembly that he would be getting the award but he didn’t know the exact date of the assembly. It wasn’t until his teacher sent home a note that we knew when it was all going to go down. Since I was back at work, I could not go but Millhouse and Beanz went that morning to see him get his award. He was super excited to see that he had a cheering squad and he held up his award proudly for them to see. That night we had bacon pizza for dinner because how else would you celebrate getting the principals award when you’re five.
  • The NP was on TV. Well, she was on more than TV, she was in the local paper and on TV. Her drum squad was featured for being the youngest group in the province to actually perform and compete for drumming in the province. Which is pretty damn cool. But the fact that she is also the only girl in her squad is also a pretty big deal. She has been drumming for forever now and she holds her own against the boys and now she is being recognized for just how good she is. It is a pretty cool accomplishment she has achieved.
  • Trinidad happened. I LOVED it. It helped heal me. I needed it. LOVED IT.
  • Millhouse discovered a ghetto version of Dave and Busters about two blocks away from the house. It is a small laser tag/mini golf/arcade type place. It doesn’t look like much from the outside and the inside is really small but for what it is, which is a place for the kids to burn off energy, it is really good. It is the type of place where we can take the kids on a Sunday afternoon when they are bored out of their mind and it will keep them busy. They have been a couple times and they seems to really like it. Mats gets really exciting about getting to go there. I think it is because he is finally getting included in some big kid adventures. I thought it was expensive until I found out there was a wagjag deal for it. Now that I have coupons, we will be going there more often. J

Christmas 2016

You know I am behind with this blogging thing when I am writing about Christmas on New Years Eve. But hey, better late than never, right?

Christmas was quiet this year. We tried to keep things low key and for the most part, we succeeded.

One big difference this year is we went to the mall to see Santa. For the past 12 years, we have gone to my work party for the kids to see Santa. This year my work let me know that since I was currently on leave, I was not invited to the party and neither were my children, which hurt. Not because my work was being petty but because the kids actually looked forward to the party and were asking about it. So to make up for not going to my work party I took them to the mall to get some sort of face to face time with the big guy. To Mat especially, this is a big deal. Santa is the man when you are five and I couldn’t not let him see him.

We got to the mall just as Santa opened but there was a huge line in front of us. Apparently people had lined up from 8am even though Santa didn’t show up until 11am. But we were there already and decided that meeting with Santa needed to be done, so we lined up for two hours to see Santa and ten minutes before it was our turn, Mat started throwing up. Literally, he said he felt sick and then starting throwing up everywhere. He threw up all over himself, his shoes and my purse. I had to send Maks through the mall to grab Beanz and the NP who were sitting just off to the side waiting for us to get our pictures done. Thank goodness they were there or else I would have been hopeless. The NP jumped into action and grabbed a custodian who came right over. I rushed Mat over to the bathrooms and after stripping off his sweater and cleaning up his shoes, I got him back to Beanz just in time for him to get to see Santa. By that time, he was a bundle of nerves. He wasn’t feeling well, he was in the presence of a rock star and he was just out of sorts. He managed to talk to Santa and keep everything down on the ride home, which is always a good thing. I think him being sick was a combination of nerves, a lot of milky bubble tea and a stomach bug that would take over his little body the next day, that got to him. From that day one, he was so sick, he didn’t help do much but he was back to himself by Christmas eve. Which was good because Christmas eve is a big deal when you are five and to spend it throwing up would not be fun.

There was the expected craziness of the kids on Christmas morning and to be perfectly honest that was my favourite part. I love the reaction and the excitement. Even if you don’t feel it yourself (and I didn’t feel it this year), they do and they react with a level of frenzy and exhilaration that is just contagious. I am happy just feeding off their excitement.

The highlight of all the presents given and received this year was when Mat discovered a 500ml bottle of root beer in his stocking. He was beyond excited about that. It was something he told everyone about. And I think it is something he won’t ever forget. It was an unusual stocking gift but it absolutely suited him. He loves root beer but we limit how much of it he has so to get his own bottle in his stocking was a huge deal.

After all the presents opening and cleaning up, it was time to cook. I made a lot of food this year. I made about 25 different things, if you count the sweets but that was because I was expecting more people than we had. I wanted to make sure we had enough food. I have this thing about having enough food. I never want people to come over and there not be enough to eat. I would be mortified if that ever happened so I always make a lot and a big selection because I want to know everyone can eat as much as they want and if I am lucky there will be just enough leftovers.

Just enough leftovers is a good thing in this house. There was a lot leftover but that is a blessing for me. Leftovers mean easy repurposed leftover dinners. We had two different kinds of soup, plus loads of hash and stirred fried vegetables thanks to all the leftovers. It sounds weird but I love the leftovers just as much as I love the food itself.

We ate into late in the day. The kids played with their toys and books and things. We watched ridiculously horrible action movies and went to bed before midnight.

All in all, Christmas was good. I hope yours was everything you imaged it would be.

November – when everything breaks

November was a rough month. We had so many major disasters in November, it is not even funny. So many big ticket items broke; there was a point when I really thought I was going to have a meltdown.

First the bed broke. Our bed is pretty impressive. It is this solid wood massive old school bed. It has this pillar things and iron framing on the top. It is just whoa. Millhouse fell in love with it and had to have it right away. He loved it up until it broke his toe a couple of months ago. Then he wanted to get rid of but that is a different story for a different time. Right now back to how the bed broke. When Millhouse gets home from work, he is exhausted. He has worked all night and he just wants to go to sleep so he falls into bed like a drunken mastodon. He just stumbles, collapses, grunts and then falls asleep. Most times he doesn’t care which side of the bed he falls on or how he lands, just as long as his head is on a pillow, he will sleep. So he did he patented mastodon falling down move one day and he heard a loud crack. We have this super tall mattress on the bed along with a box spring but somehow he had managed the break the wooden planks supporting everything. And because he was tired, he didn’t bother to really look over what caused the loud crack. Instead, he just rolled to the other side of the bed and went to sleep. When he got up and remembered that he had made the bed make a noise it doesn’t normally make, he decided to investigate. The weight of everything on the bed had caused the planks to break off the frame. Millhouse attached them back together with extra-long screws and glue but I am not sure how much longer the bed is going to make it. If you roll over onto the not so secure side the bed groans in distress and I have visions of waking up to a slanted bed one day. More specifically, waking up to a snoring Millhouse rolled on top of me because the bed has collapsed on one side and gravity has propelled him forward and I am slowly suffocating but he doesn’t notice because he doesn’t realize that it is me he is squishing.

Next, my car went kaput. My car is a special kind of creature and is really old. But since it is a Honda, it is still running and I will keep driving it as long as it keeps running. With that being said, it is still running so in theory it should still be on the road but it’s not. I have it living in the driveway right now because the gas line has rotted away. It is so bad that if I fill the tank in the morning by afternoon I have a half a tank. Now there is no gas in the tank right now as I am not driving it. Nor will I put gas into the tank and drive it to the mechanics for fear of having it spontaneously combust on me. My next option is to have the mechanic come tow the car for me, which out of all my options I like the best. There are two mechanics we go to and they are both family friends. And I know that they are both on holidays right now. In fact, they were in holiday mode in November and that is why I did not take the car over yet. When people are in holiday mode, they are slack. I know these guys will do a quick patch job and have me come back when they are not busy in January so I decided to wait until January to get the car fixed. Right now I am not too keen on driving and if I have to go anywhere, I go with Beanz or take Millhouse’s vehicle. My car is sitting in the driveway, and I will look into fixing that one in the new year or maybe figure out a way to sell this car and get a newer car in the new year. I haven’t decided which yet.

Last one and the biggest one, my stove died. Like full out stopped working. Within a 48 hour window all the elements on the cook top went out and would not go back on. The oven still worked but it was uneven. One side was running way hotter than the other so cooking anything in there was uneven unless I went in and turned it halfway through. I started using Beanz stove for big meals and cooking smaller things on my counter top griddle but neither of these were long term solutions. I don’t know a lot about stoves but I know if this is going on, then that means I don’t have much life left in the stove and had to get a new one. A couple of people gave me tips on repairing it or the contact details of people who could fix the stove but the stove was so old I couldn’t even find the model details and the fuse panel that I needed to replace was being made anymore. I was out of luck. I hemmed and hawed for almost a month before I bit the bullet and went out and got a new stove. I dragged Millhouse to eight different stores before I found a stove that I liked and was cost effective. I wanted to make sure we got a stove that was going to last a really long time because I really did not want to go through all of this again anytime soon. Out of everything that broke last month the stove was the most important thing to get replaced and the new stove was delivered today.

Here’s hoping nothing breaks in December.

Sharing a bed with a five year old

Last night at 3am, while the entire world was fast asleep, I lay in bed half awake. This is nothing new. I have not been sleeping well for months now so being awake at 3am was not as disturbing as it has been. I have starting embracing it. It is usually around 3am when I stop trying to make myself go to sleep so I can be sure I am able to wake up when it is time to wake up. Anyway back to my story, it was 3am and everyone else in the house was asleep. Mats was asleep beside me and for the most part, everything was status quo.

Then Mats changed things up on me.

He kicked off all the covers and stood up on the bed. He looked around and then took a few steps towards me. Then he turned around so he back was facing me and sat down with a plop right on my stomach. All while he was still asleep.

And the very first thing that popped into my head when he did flung his butt onto my stomach was: “AW MAN!!!! This kid thinks he has walked to the bathroom and he is about to pee on me”. This is going to get messy real quick! I wasn’t concerned about the fact that Mats was asleep in a sitting position on my stomach. My concern was what was about to come out of his butt at that very moment.

So I sat up super-fast and pushed Mats off my stomach. I tried to wake him up so he could go back into his spot on the bed but he wasn’t having any of it. He sprawled out across the entire bed and decided he was going to sleep there. I wasn’t having him take over the bed like that, I might not be sleeping but I wasn’t going to give up my warm blankets without a showdown. So I hoisted him back up into his spot, covered him up and lay back down. Then he promptly woke up and asked for chocolate milk.

I told him it was 3am and he was to go back to bed because there was no chocolate milk readily available at this time, so he lay down and fell asleep. And I lay down and went back to thinking about if I should add caramel candies to my coffee in the morning.

For the record, I did not add the caramel candies to my coffee even though I do think that would be a delicious idea.

Mats wants to have a baby

Lately Mats has been expressing his need to procreate. This was something he sort of sprung on me out of the blue a couple of weeks ago. We were having our nightly conversation about the state of the world and he told me he is going to have a baby when he is ready. Now given that Mats is FIVE, I didn’t really expect to be having a baby conversation with him this early on but if this is what he wants to talk about, then this is what we are going to talk about. After the first conversation, he has mentioned the baby on and off in passing every now and then, but I pretty much know he has pretty much figured out what he wants to do.

So here is the gist of the conversation.

Mats has decided that when he gets old enough, he wants to have a baby.

He is not too keen on the getting married part and has decided he will go ahead with having the baby but not getting married. He knows people can have babies and not be married and he is cool with that. I did, however, stress to him the importance in making sure whomever he decides to procreate with knows his intention upfront about not getting married. I explained to him that some girls would prefer to be married when they have babies and they could get very angry and upset if they have a baby with someone who did not want to get married. Now at this time, he does not have a specific girl in mind to have the baby with but he is confident this is something he can figure out as the time gets closer.

I also explained to him that he would have to work really hard as a dad. I told him being a dad is more than just playing with a baby and he will have to work harder than he has ever imagined working to take care of his child (and yes, at this time he only wants one baby). He told he knew how hard it was to be a dad; you have to work all day and be really tired when you get home, you never get to watch your own t.v. shows or play your own video games, and you have to buy things all the time for your baby but he is OK with that. He just wants to have someone he can love because he says having someone to love is important.

Now, so far through the conversation, Mats had an answer for every question I posed to him. He had really thought about this and it was obvious. But his last statement threw me for a loop and I wasn’t sure how to explain it to him; he wanted to have the baby. As in he wanted to be the one to carry and birth the baby. This is why he didn’t think the marriage bit was important, he wanted to be the one to do it all. And when I explained to him that boys could not actually carry babies, he got very upset. He thought it was really unfair only girls could have the babies in their tummies. He didn’t understand why a boy who wanted to have a baby could not just get one put in their stomachs like girls did. This put a whole new spin on our conversation and I was stumped as to how to explain why only girls could carry children. Thankfully, he was really tired by this point and I told him we would finish talking about this part later.

So far he has taken me up on that, and I am glad. Cause I still don’t have an answer for him.

Jack Sprat and his brother

Maks is a big kid.

Like a big kid.

He is eight years old and weights 100lbs. He is over five feet tall. He is taller and heavier than just about every other kid in his class. He is bigger and heavier than most of the kids in the grades above him as well. He is routinely getting asked if he is older than ten. Most people just do not believe he is eight by looking at him.

But he is eight.

Mats is a little kid.

Like a little kid.

He is five years old and weighs less than 40lbs. He is just over three feet tall. He is smaller and lighter than just about every other kid in his class. He is lighter and smaller than most of the kids in the grade below him as well. He is routinely getting asked if he is younger than five. Most people just do not believe he is five by looking at him.

But he is five.

Having a really big kid and a really little kid makes things complicated when it comes to food, eating and dinner time. Maks will eat everything that is placed in front of him and then he will go on and eat something else after he has had his meal. He will generally have a pre-dinner snack, followed by dinner followed by an after dinner snack. His eating isn’t just about junk food either, he has no problem finishing off containers full of fruit, smoothies, cereal, or crackers and cheese. He eats continuously throughout the day and he is starting to show just how big he is.

Mats, on the other hand barely eats; he will nibble occasionally but unless he is forced he routinely never finishes his very small meals. Mats refuses to eat anything that is wet, has a sauce, cannot be held or is hot. He needs to eat handheld foods that leave his hands dry and cool. Pasta, soup or rice is not something he eats. In fact, suggesting pasta, soup or rice leads to meltdowns and tears and the occasional throwing up. He also cannot eat large portions of anything. If his dinner is larger than a hotdog, he won’t be able to eat it all. It is as though his stomach just will not allow that much food.

I am the proud parent of Jack Sprat and his little brother. If you don’t know the nursery rhyme; Jack Sprat could eat no fat. His wife could eat no lean. In between the two of them, they ate the platter clean.

In this case Jack Sprat is Mat and since he does not have a wife, Maks is the partner in crime. Between the two of them, I spend almost $1000 a month on groceries but neither of them has the same dinner. Most nights Maks will get a large plate of food with protein, carbs and a bit of veggies. But Mats will get a considerably smaller plate with a few pieces of protein (if I am lucky), a bit of carbs and loads of vegetables and salad.

It seems so odd to me that either will eat what the other one likes. The both refuse to eat like the other. The doctor assures me that they are both healthy and not to worry about how or what they are eating. He says when it comes to food, as long as they are eating, they are OK but I still wonder if they are getting enough.

For now though, I have the living version of a nursery rhyme at my dinner table.


Last Friday I had my first naturopath appoint. Now I was told to go see a naturopath by one of Beanz’ friends last April when I started complaining about my thyroid issues but I never really took her seriously. She believes in crystals, auras and reads tarot cards, so I figured since we have very different lifestyles that having the same kind of doctor would not work.

Now this was said before I was put through a battery of tests, started throwing up twice a day and starting losing fistful upon fistful of hair. So because I am somewhat stubborn; it took all those bad things happening and the universe turning against me to change my mind.

Normally a naturopath appointment is around $150 each time you see them because they are normally not covered by the government healthcare. They are considered along the lines of a chiropractor, needed sometimes but not needed enough to be completely funded by the government. But after asking around, I found out my humble little (gigantic) town has a naturopath clinic available for free in the hospital. You just need to be able to go in and see them in the evenings.

Score! More free healthcare!

So I went to see my doctor on Tuesday and I got all the latest test results from him so the naturopath would have some idea as to what he was facing with me. On Friday he spent an hour going through my long and complicated medical stuff and came back to me with a PLAN.

Dude! An actual plan!

This isn’t to just treat the symptoms. It’s not just pills. It is an actual honest to goodness plan to make me better. I need to keep a food journal for him so he can see how often I eat, what I eat and when I eat. Based on this, he is going to put together a diet and exercise plan for me. It will be tailored to my habits and the foods I normally eat. He is also starting acupuncture on me this week. His goal is to get the ovarian cysts and fibroids to shrink and hopefully become less painful.

Now acupuncture is a big question mark for me. I have never had acupuncture done and I have no idea what to expect. I mean, are they going to stick needles into my stomach and this is not supposed to hurt?! But given how much stuff I have been through already, some needles to the stomach may not always be a bad thing.


Random Things – The Lottery Edition

Have you ever read the shopaholic book, where she buys a lottery ticket and she believes she has the winning ticket? So she plans how she is going to spend all of her money and even plans how she would announce the fact she is a millionaire to her parents? And then as she is sitting there watching the lottery numbers being read out, she realizes she doesn’t have the winning ticket and starts yelling at the TV because she thinks they lottery people are reading the numbers wrong? I can relate to that. And because of my weird connection to the lottery, I don’t do lottery like most people. I have a method to my madness. I have not won anything yet so I am not sure if my madness actually works but I still do it and one of these days I will tell my parents I’ve won the lottery just like I have it planned out in my head.

  1. I only buy a ticket if the lotto jackpot is over $50 million. I don’t really see the point of buying a ticket if it is less than that. It’s not that I need more $50+ million dollars to survive; I just seem to think it is not necessary to spend the money on a ticket unless I am not going to win super big.
  2. When I do buy a ticket, I put the ticket in my mom’s money tree. I don’t think the money tree is particularly lucky; but it is called a money tree so that has to mean it will add more money to the ticket. Or it could mean it will take out the money from the ticket. I am not sure which it is yet.
  3. I don’t check my ticket until weeks after the draw has been done, especially if the winning ticket was purchased anywhere near where I live. The pressure surrounding having a winning ticket gets to me, even if the pressure is all in my head.

And in case you are wondering, as of this moment, I have yet to actually win anything more than $20 in the lottery.

Midnight conversations

Halloween messes me up. I am nervous most of the time, but Halloween makes things worse. And with Millhouse deciding that this is a fantastic time to start watching a Friday the 13th marathon, I am just a big chicken right now.

Last night at 11pm:

Me: “Millhouse, did you hear that?”

Millhouse: “hmmmmmmmm………………………”

Me: “Millhouse, wake up! Did you hear theat? Is one of the kids in the room? Is Mat in the room, sniffling?”

Millhouse: “No, it is just us.”

Me: “No one else is in the room?! Then what is that noise?!”

Millhouse: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Me: “Millhouse, wake up! See this why I f*cking hate Halloween. There is probably some freaking gremlin in the room and I am going to die in my sleep! F*cking Halloween!!”

Millhouse: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz