Portion Control

I am the horrible hybrid of a binge eater meets a grazer.  I have the awful ability to eat all day long and still overeat at the end of the day.  It is horrible.  I know I am an emotional eater but I am also never seem to get that full sensation until I cross that invisible line into uncomfortably full.  Millhouse has his own eating issues.  He is a social overeater.  When he is at work that is when he eats the most and it is because everyone around him eats.  They treat meals like a eating contest and the group of them will try to outdo each other by eating large amounts of burgers or pizza or burritos.  He will gorge himself on foods but only when other people can see him.  We each have our own food vices and I have always believes this is something I dealt with on our own but it turns out it is not.

The boys eat have their own food vices.  Maks is just like me.  Maks can eat all day long, never seeming to get full, and then overeat at the end of the day.  And unlike me, he doesn’t just eat bad things.  He can binge on healthy foods too.  In fact most days he grazes on healthy foods throughout the day and then at night he will binge on unhealthy foods.  He can spend an entire day eating sandwiches and fruit and then decide he wants a big plate of nachos an hour after he has had dinner.  If I try to replace the nachos with fruit or vegetables, he will still eat it but he will stay hungry and get up at night to tell me he his hungry.  I have been trying really hard to control what Maks eat but no matter what I do he just eats and always seems to be hungry.

I have taken him to the doctor and medically, there is nothing wrong with him.  He is healthy but husky.  He is not big boned but he is going to grow up to be a thicker person.  The doctor is not worried but I am mostly because I know that my bad habits are the reason why he eats the way he does.  He sees his father and I eating this way and he thinks it is OK.  When we try to change our eating habits, he notices that and he sees we are trying to make a change but because we can’t make the change stick, he doesn’t change either.

 Mats is nothing like his brother.  He is on the complete opposite side of the spectrum.  Rather than eating too much, he hardly eats at all.  Most days it is a miracle for him to eat half a hot dog.  Half a hot dog to Mats is the equivalent of a large turkey dinner to another person.  I can put plate after plate in front of Mats and he won’t eat any of it even if it something that he really likes.  The most he will eat is a couple of bites before he goes back to doing other things.  I have taken him to the doctor as well and the doctor says Mats is healthy.  He won’t be a bruiser when he grows up but he is a perfectly normal, slim little boy. 

 It is frustrating because as much as I want Maks to stop eating so much, I want Mats to start eating more.  It’s as though they don’t listen to what I tell them instead they are internalizing what I am saying to their brother.  Mats hears me tell Maks not to eat so much so he stops eating.  Maks hears me tell Mats to eat more so he starts eating more.  They are doing the opposite of what I want them to do.

 I can’t seem to find a happy middle ground.

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