Story # 1 – The Tale of the Rum Smuggler

Lately the boys have been coming home with some interesting stories from school. And I swear there were these two stories that just left me flabbergasted. I had to ask for clarification halfway through both stories and I even asked them to tell me the stories again after they were done, just to make sure I had heard the right thing the first time around. Turns out the stories were just as crazy the second time around.

Here is one of those stories. This one is from Mats’ class.

During lunch one day, a little girl in Mats’ kindergarten class decided to show everyone what she snuck into school in her lunch bag. Now the school has pretty strict rules on what you can bring in for lunch. It is a combination of the usual things like; no peanuts or other tree nuts because those allergies could lead to some pretty serious reactions, to some pretty nutritionally specific ones like; no candy or chips at all because the kids need to eat healthy. From what Mats’ tells me all the kids in his class are pretty good at making sure their parents only give them the things they are allowed to have but every once in a while someone sneaks in some chips or candy and they cannot resist showing the rest of the class whatever it is they have snuck in. Successfully sneaking in gummy fruit gushers is a pretty big deal in kindergarten. So on this day one of Mats’ classmates was really excited to show the other kids what she smuggled into class because it was way cooler than candy. When they were sure the teachers were otherwise occupied, she pulled out her loot. It was a teeny little bottle of rum. RUM!!! As one little boy pointed out rum is alcohol. And yes, it really was rum as in the alcohol. She had snuck into her parents alcohol stash and swiped a little sample bottle of rum that they had put away. She thought it looked very neat and wanted to show everyone the really cool baby bottle of rum her parents had at home. Now she knew it was wrong to sneak the bottle but she wanted to show it off to her classmates so after her mom has made her lunch and left the room, she went over and swiped it and hid it in her bag. (According to Mats) But the big part of Mats’ story was that she lied to the teachers when they came around and asked about it. She claimed it wasn’t hers and that was what Mats’ was flabbergasted by. She lied after telling everyone about it because she knew she would get in trouble. Now if the little boy who recognized that rum was alcohol, hadn’t made such a big commotion about it being a bottle of rum, the teacher would never had known that some sort of contraband was being passed around the lunch tables. But when the teacher heard the commotion, she came over to investigate and discovered that the hoopla was not over fruit gushers but a bottle of rum. She took it away from the kids and went to make some phone calls. I can only imagine how interesting the call to the parents would have been that day. This child will forever be referred to as the Rum Smuggler.

When Mats’ told me the story, I had to stop him a couple of times to confirm what I was actually hearing because I couldn’t believe that a five year old actually smuggled rum into an elementary school.

I thought that only happened in high school.

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